The Best Songs From Cartoons For Grown Ups

The Best Songs From Cartoons For Grown Ups

WARNING: This List Is Canon

  1. The Simpsons – God Bless the Child

OK so this is branded Simpsons and is sung in character by Lisa Simpson but it was not actually on the show. It’s from the album The Simpsons Sing The Blues which came out in 1990, the same year the show premiered. It’s very early-simpsons in its characterization and a strange mix of covers of old blues songs and new material, some featuring Michael Jackson (!) including “Do the Bartman,” which was outrageously popular and though it was never released as a single – only as part of this weird album – and therefore never eligible to chart in the US, it did reach #1 in Australia, Ireland, New Zealand, Norway, and the United Kingdom.

Anyway so this is Lisa Simpson singing a song by Billie Holiday. I love it way more than any other version of the song and more in general than I should any song by a cartoon character. But really it’s just Yeardley Smith, Lisa’s voice actor and something of a singer in her own write, doing a cover I like a lot.


2. South Park – Kyle’s Mom is a Bitch

As far as I know this is the only one I’m gonna pick that’s like “THE” song from a cartoon, the one that even people don’t watch know about. This song was like actually considered kind of edgy at the time from what I remember. I just think it is catchy.


3. Futurama – Bureaucrat Song

It’s been like a week and I have made no progress on this blog post so now I am just gonna write rapid fire descriptions so I can post this fucking thing; you don’t like it, COMPLAIN TO THE MANAGEMENT.

Island Rhythms


4. Mission Hill – She’ll be comin’ round the mountain

They only sing a couple times in this show at all I think, I just wanted to include Mission Hill cause it good


5. Bob’s Burgers – Taffy Butt

I never watched the Goonies much so I don’t have the crazy nostalgia for it that everyone else our age does. That said I guess this whole episode is a reference to it including this song, which parodies “The Goonies R Good Enough” by Cyndi Lauper and which actually features Cyndi so that is fun. Plus at the end of the credits Tina dances with Jimmy Jr. and it’s p cute


6. The Flintstones – Hollyrock-a-bye-baby

I have not heard this song since I was 6 years old including just now when I silently pulled it from youtube without being detected at the reference desk, so sorry it probably sucks. I remember it blowing my mind that fred flintstone had a grand kid like 40 or 50 years after he first appeared on TV and it was like this big tender moment.

I also just wanted to include the flintstones so I could make a reverse-joke about how “This IS your grandpa’s cartoon listicle” but eh fuck that


Morning music for all day

Sometimes its really rainy outside and everything is bleak in your corporate office. But, when you’re not contemplating how much worse the rest of the week is going to be (it will be) listen to this song for a little bit.

A melancholy weather report; for the 2nd day of this week

A melancholy weather report; for the 2nd day of this week


An omnipresence of rain flecks will assert itself all morning. They are darkly appealing, like the pure sensory appeal of an iron frying pan full of sizzling onions. Certain melancholy synth tracks from the late 1970s to very early 1980s seem appropriate.


Where this sputtering mist lacks the concentrated dramatic punch of the thunderstorm, it makes up ground in continuous distributed output; like tension weeping from the offal of our collective unconscious’s bruised brain.

The bison statue right outside my window isn’t even attracting photo opportunists today. This is the statue:


People love this thing


They are posing for pictures all of the time


New students, wedding parties, people with lightsabers; I see them all


But not today, today it is pretty forlorn.

I could not find a picture of the statue where it is raining; in substitution please accept this portrait which indicates how we all really feel.


Donald Duck 1934-2016

Donald Duck 1934-2016

Donald Duck, the legendary entertainer and consummate showman, has died of cancer at the age of 81.

A statement was issued by Disney CEO Bob Iger, saying Duck “died peacefully” Thursday night, “surrounded by his family and loved ones.”

Known for his fiery temper and soulful, earthy quack, Donald Duck appeared in over 200 feature films, shorts, and television series, as well as comics, theme park attractions and children’s books. Originally portraying a “screwball comedy” character conceived as a balance to his longtime collaborative partner Mickey Mouse, Duck became a core member of Disney’s funny animal films and delighted generations of children. He is particularly known for his signature phrases, including “Aw, phooey,” “Why I oughta…” and “WAGGHKKAWAKWAKWAKWAK.”

The son of Scottish immigrants, Donald changed his last name from McDuck in order to make a start in Hollywood (though it would later be used openly by Donald’s uncle, Scrooge). Making his first appearance in 1934’s The Wise Little Hen, he is widely recognized for paving the way for ducks and, indeed, birds of all kinds in show business.

“#RIPDONALD, No doubt we o u everything, countless fowl would hav no career if not for u!” tweeted the angry bird from angry birds.

Duck was also recognized for his service in World War 2, and proudly wore his sailor’s uniform for much of his career.

“My Uncle Donald taught me so much about the world,” said Duck’s nephew, Louie, who has portrayed the original Donald character since 2006’s Mickey Mouse Clubhouse premiered. “He taught me the importance of family, and of making people laugh. he will be missed by so many.”


There’s an aesthetic I really like but don’t have the vocabulary to describe

There’s an aesthetic I really like but don’t have the vocabulary to describe

Another pictures post, I guess I am visually-minded today.

I guess it’s kind of like ‘mid-century modern’ —




(I’m actually kinda freaking out that I found this last one, it’s a real piece of furniture my grandparents own. A record and 8-track player/minibar/fake fireplace.)

But the furniture alone doesn’t do enough to describe it. Everyone has seen pictures of this stuff in like basic living rooms with low ceilings in the 1960s. And indeed the aesthetic IS tied to the 60s, but it’s not just that design philosophy that makes me like it so much.


I specifically enjoy this kind of crazy, geometric design within a space that is kind of large and looming, and multipurpose.

Here’s some looks at a set from the movie Help, starring The Beatles. Within the film, this set is meant to be the house the lads all live in together – there’s a gag where they all walk home, wave at each other and walk into four separate doors next to each other. Then it cuts to an interior view where it’s revealed that all 4 doors enter the same shared, big living space. It would be hard to overstate how much I have enjoyed this fake house from since I was a little kid.

All of the pictures I could find of this online were pretty small, so actually maybe go ahead and watch this little scene first:

OK now I can talk about some of the things I really love.


Paul’s Wurlitzer organ rising up out of the ground is AMAZING. Like I could go on about just this thing by itself for a while, probably. The shape, the lights, the rising platform! The fixed lamp nearby! My dad’s friend Curt, who trained me in the art of comics, has an organ in his home and he keeps a row of 60s comics on the music stand in imitation of this scene. I love it so bad.


I have always wanted a bed like John’s little sunken-in bed with bookshelves.


Here is a similar view, but a little better look at Ringo’s wall of 60s-style vending machines, which are actually maybe the best part of the whole thing. I don’t know what it is about that that I like so much. There’s the design of the machines, for one thing. All geometric lines, shiny metal, flourished logos hanging out in well-thought-out negative space. But it’s also maybe just the idea of replacing a kitchen with an instant-output food wall. It’s such a pleasingly outdated view of modernism/futurism, but like, also exactly the kind of thing a group of rich young men would want to buy in real life.

My other example is the titular hotel from Grand Budapest Hotel, but – of course- it’s the 1960s version used in the wraparound framing narrative I love.

In the film, this version is actually contrasted against the 1920s decor and is meant to represent the slow decay of gentility and refinement in the 20th century but I love it WAY more.


This room is even bigger than The Beatles had. I love that it’s so vast, I love the shiny veneer of the different kinds of paneling on the wall. I love that you can tell how quiet it is in there just by looking at it. I love that the seats are like a little comfortable island within the larger ecosystem of the space.

Some more really cool vending machines. I think it appeals to the same part of my mind that likes things tidy. Everything all perfect and lined up and like, exactly the way it should be.


Everything has that kind of sleek look, and every individual furniture on down to the ashtray is like its own sovereign, freestanding nation. It gives such a desolate and melancholy feel. But the warm colors all blend into each other and make it feel kind of warm. I want to say “Cozy Desolation?”

I like how it looks simultaneously well-lit and sort of dim and atmospheric. I swear to god that is how my dreams look.

If you were to represent my mind metaphorically as interior design, it would look like these places.